Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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