No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Randomize
