question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
A bitchslap is in order.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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