Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
