only if we run a train.
done.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
