She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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