A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
