Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(727): View more from Florida

Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus

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(860): View more from Connecticut

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

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(972): View more from Texas

Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving

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(303): View more from Colorado

im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.

(1-303): View more from Colorado

that was a mass text, wasnt it?

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(612): View more from Minnesota

It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.

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(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.

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