worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
