Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
