i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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