Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
