They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i will never coherently bang her
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
