I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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