You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize