I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
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