he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
