Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize