hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Randomize
