I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Randomize
