I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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