I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Randomize
