Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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