to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
