You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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