shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
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