Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
