dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
