and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
