U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
