VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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