I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
