How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize