i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Randomize