I'm going to jail i love you
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
