we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
