If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize