With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
