What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
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