what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
