he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
