Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
