Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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