His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
