i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
