After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Never underestimate the power of titties
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
