They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
