I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she peed on how many people?
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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