she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
my liver is dry heaving
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
