how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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