So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
