just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
