some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
